[1]. The moment you say `I do’ to the one you love, that begins another chapter in your journey towards filling a given purpose in life....
[1]. The moment you say `I do’ to the one you love, that begins another chapter in your journey towards filling a given purpose in life. This definition of defining your purpose comes with a gradual progression. In keeping to your faith in marriage, you both need to tell yourself the simple real truth. And that is to put aside your ego and make the marriage work no matter the challenges that you might encountered.
[2]. In marriage, there is something called aging. You need to age graciously with your spouse which should sincerely be done in love. If you become too authoritarian and want to control everything without giving in to the other person’s feeling and reasoning pattern, then aging graciously becomes not only frustrating but that of an unfulfilling relationship.
[3]. When you age together in love, then good health becomes that of a good portion in the home. Wealth gotten through the burning desire of love shall always stand the test of time. And this would be made possible if both partners understood the purpose of what marriage was meant to be. Aging graciously together requires that both of you do things together in love. There should be no greediness and one partner should not want to be seen as having a monopoly in the marriage. When you learn to accommodate one another in love, you will build a home where love reigns.
[4]. Lack of discipline and the act of irresponsibility towards making a change in your marriage can hinder the growth of that relationship. There should be variety and spices in your relationship with your spouse. Things should not be done in a mechanical way. One should not seek to become bossy over the other. When you relate in an atmosphere of true friendship like little kids would do without harbouring any grudges against one another, you will always have a home where there is peace. And when you disciple yourself beyond any reasonable doubt and stay focus without doubting your ability to excel, no matter the challenges that you both might encounter, there shall always be a way for you to overcome your challenges at every phases that you encounter them in your marriage.
[5]. For your marriage to work, you need knowledge, wisdom and of all understanding. When you apply wisdom, you shall at all times know what to do without giving in to unnecessary negative feelings that will add no value to your marriage. When you have wisdom and put an understanding of that knowledge into action, you will have a fulfilling home with a peace of mind. But the moment you have wisdom and seeks not to do anything with it, then same problem shall always be there waiting for you. Why you need wisdom in your marriage is for you to build your home for a perfect lifetime of everlasting happiness which is what shall become beneficial to all that are involved in the family.
[6]. Ignorant is no excuses in marriage. You need to learn as long as you can scent between good and evil. If what you seek to do if such is done to you, you wouldn’t take it lightly, then why seek to do same to another. Relationship in marriage works together when both have self-respect for one another. When respect begets respect, then things shall go on smoothly without any iota of doubt in the relationship. Marriage is what should enable both of you to do things together while sharing the experiences that should bring you joy. You shouldn’t live together but feeling as if both of you are far distance apart. Your attitude and conduct are what could reduce your bound in achieving the bliss of marriage. If you can deal with your attitude in a positive way, then you will have it all in your marriage.
[7]. Do not ignore the advice of elders in your quest to have a successful marriage. But in as much as you listen to anyone’s advice, let your decision be the final. Do not give in to all type of advice as such will become so confusing to you. You may not be able to decode the intention of others toward the type of advice they give to you. When you allowed outsiders to have a grip on deciding how your run your home and life, then you are as a matter of fact creating problem for your marriage. If there is one thing you should do, it is for you both to learn how to settle your indifferences together without involving any third party. When you learn to solve your differences within yourself, you shall have a good home without any external complications.
[8]. Walking in one accord helps the home to function with integrity. The single act that you both are true to yourself without any doubt is a plus to your marriage. When you learn to do things together, then that element of trust shall always be there. Trust is built on togetherness and that of an open mindedness. When you are true to yourself, then you will be true to others without giving in to doubt on their part. Respecting the view and opinion of your spouse should be that which is paramount in your mind. When you learn to respect one another’s view, you will live to enjoy the benefit of it all. Love is built on self-respect and it is what will help the home to grow rather than dwelling things that will bring no glory to the marriage.
[9]. When you put one another’s down in public then that element of self-respect is defeated. Even when your spouse in wrong in their approach to a matter in public, you don’t need to put such down in public. When you do such, you belittle their ego and others might never accord to them that self-respect. A better time to trash things out is in your bedroom in the privacy of both of you. And when this is done, let it be done with words that edifice rather than such that pulls down the moral of your spouse. Let there be coordination in your attitude to one another. And your communication in moment of distress should be that which speaks of love and care. When you learn to respect one another view in public no matter how odd it might sounds in your ear, then in so doing, you are building a foundation that would help you correct the wrong rather than reacting in a negative way with emotional outburst that wouldn’t on a long run do you any good.
[10]. Every husband and wife needs to understand their role in building the home and making their marriage work. When you understand your role, then it becomes easier to carry out your responsibility without choking the other person. Though marriage is demanding but when both couple knows their roles and seems to play it well, it makes things easier to accommodate. Understanding your role in marriages has to do with lots of effective communication between couples. You need to talk about all that needs to be talked about. Little talk with lots of details would do your marriage so much good than harm. Learn to talk about everything if you are such that says you don’t talk much. The process of talking will open you up to more discussion which will enable you have a better understanding of your spouse. When you communicate without reservation it helps you build a better understanding of getting to know the role both of you should play in making your marriage work.
[11]. If the moment you both are able to discuss in endless is when you are having misunderstanding, then how are you going to spend time in building your marriage? When all you do is to be at each other’s throat while creating a scene for others to see; there you are not only making a mockery of your union but also giving others around you the audacity to disrespect both of you. The respect others shall accord to you is first seen on how you both respect yourselves. No one will respect you if all you do is fight over little matters that can be settled amicably without the exchange of words.
[12]. Marriage is said to be healthy when those involved are able to understand one another. That understanding has to do with both parties becoming truthful to themselves. The level of understanding shouldn’t be that which the other would take offend and behave in a manner that is unbecoming of their person. When you love, you should have some level of tolerant and not become so rigid in your affair that you would have no time of that friendly attitude that brings about a warm atmosphere. When all you do is to get offended and in the process put one another down with words, building a good home with love would always be a thing that is far away. The ability to put down your ego and accept your responsibility when you are right or wrong, makes you not less a human but someone that has the love of your home at heart. The moments you are able to accept your fault without carrying any grudges in your mind, then you are on the right ways towards building your relationship with the right attitude that brings about the needed change. You shouldn’t be too rigid and so harsh in dealing with issues in your marriage. When you are too rigid and harsh, you would always encounter challenges that might always be so hard to resolve. Love habour no grudges and too much harshness hinders the flow of building a relationship. Let there be that atmosphere that define true friendship without taking everything too serious. When you are too serious for everything, you wouldn’t have time to relax. Learn to be jovial and play with your spouse like children would do. When there is that level of trust without feeling inferior to one another, you would have a relax mind to say things as it is and the other person wouldn’t feel offended because of the level of understanding such has for you. Your home is your playground, relate with your spouse as little children do. Let love flow in it natural and purest form. Let nothing hinders you from getting the happiness that it deserves in building your home. When you keep to the rules of the game, you will have it all for good.
[13]. In marriage, no one is above the word “Am sorry”. Where you admit it when you are either right or wrong; it doesn’t diminish your person but rather it is what redefine the real you. When you learn to say am sorry, it what makes peace to reign in your home. In marriage, it is not every right you should seek for but rather should be humble enough to seek peace at all time so as to have a peaceful home. When you admit your fault, it doesn’t make you less a human. When you seek to build intimacy in your home, the word “am sorry” would help to really turn things around for good. Build your home with the fear of God. And also humble yourself enough to accept your wrongs. Do not claim to have it all when it has to do with understanding one another.
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